So today when I was walking east on 33rd Street towards my long, long, LONG overdue* waxing appointment I heard something weird. I was walking by a hotel (or maybe a fancy apartment building? But probably a hotel because who in their right mind would want to spend a lot of money to live like 2 blocks from Penn Station) and outside there were two door guys talking. They were both definitely born and raised in New York City somewhere. Anyway, they were in the midst of a very heated conversation when one of them says to the other,
“Well, I wanted to get yoops to pick up the package but then I called the guy and the guy said that it was probably FedEx that was doing it and not yoops. I don’t know. I told the guy I think yoops is better.”
Okay. So as I walked away I started thinking about why it might be that this guy calls the company yoops rather than U.P.S. like the rest of us. I came up with the following few possibilities:
1. It’s like his cute little thing that he does. Kind of like the way that I say “water” which, admittedly, is a little less choice and a little more accent (and not terribly cute) but still. It’s like when someone says something about Carl and then you’re like “who’s Carl?” and they’re like “Oh, you know Carl. He’s the one that says yoops” and at that moment you know exactly who Carl is.
2. He doesn’t like acronyms and so therefore just doesn’t use them. He’d be all “well, there was this debate up at the ‘un’-security council the other day” or “I wonder whether ‘who’ is going to approve that new drug for malaria” or “ohmgah! Did you see the new Carie Diaries?!”**
3. Maybe he doesn’t realize that it is actually called UPS and at first all his friends and family thought that he was just making a joke and they kept letting him do it and then they realized that he was serious but they had been letting him make a fool of himself for this many years and they sort of feel like assholes pointing it out now.
4. Maybe ‘yoops’ is actually a thing that people say but nobody ever told me about it.
So, yea, that’s it for today. Other than the fact that I have Funkadelic’s “Freak of the Week” stuck in my head which, all things considered, isn’t so bad.
*You know it is overdue when your waxing lady, who you have been seeing regularly for the past 6 years, takes a look at you and goes, “Oh, Rebekah…”
**Apparently in my mind ‘Carl’ is simultaneously an international affairs student and a 15 year-old girl.
franklyrebekah 